Aishiteru, Taichou no Gouka Kanojo
by MattsyKun
Summary: Ukitake, the kind, loveable, huggable captain of the 13th squad, makes a huge mistake. But, it will turn out for the better... right? An Ukitake/Unohana love story.


_Aishiteru, Taichou no Gouka Kanojo_

Yosh! The title roughly translates to "I Love You, My Wonderful Girlfriend Captain". Long title, ain't it? It looks better in Japanese, dontcha think? Stupid 1.25" margins… [Changes to 1" margins that's better. There aren't enough Ukitake Unohana fanfics! I found, like, two good ones. Besides, I started writing this, like last year, and I found it again while going through my 5,043 files on my computer. (Can you believe that out of all those files, 4,433 of them are pictures?!)

Disclaimer: Only own Sakana. Random cameo of the 14th captain. Daughter of Shunsui. Her full name is Sakana Satoshi Kyoraku, but everyone calls her Satoshi-taichou.

Note: This takes place after Sosuke and they went to "Heaven". Some lines are in Japanese, because it sounds cool. (Nods)

* * *

Juushiro Ukitake had never been more embarrassed than he was at that very moment. _Why me?_ He thought. In the thousand years he had lived, he had done stupid things, like drinking with Shunsui. Gawd, it took him about five years to get on the Female Shinigami Association's good side after that. Shunsui had been unconscious for two weeks after that incident. He had slipped, tripped, fell upon, and kicked multiple things by accident. He had accidentally destroyed his paperwork. He spilt red wine on his sensei's cloak, and the stain never came out (he still didn't know why he was drinking red wine in the first place; he normally didn't drink). He had accidentally washed his and Shunsui's cloaks with the fuchsia haori that his best friend always wore, making both taichou's cloaks a nice shade of pink.

But none of it compared to this.

All he wanted to do was remind one captain of a random meeting. Yamamoto-soutaichou had forgotten to send out the Jigokucho, so he left it up to Kenpachi and Shunsui to remind everyone.

You would think it would be a simple task, wouldn't it? Just go to the division, find the captain, and tell them about the meeting.

Sooo simple.

But Juushiro had been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

He felt his face get really hot. _Why? Why did this have to happen?_

His colleague looked at him with concern. "_Doushita_, Ukitake-taichou (1)?"

Juushiro forced himself not to look. _I mustn't look. It would not be appropriate!_ He thought.

The situation Juushiro had gotten himself into was horrible. A pure accident.

Juushiro had been told by Kenpachi Zaraki that there was a captain's meeting that morning. The only captain that hadn't been informed had been Retsu Unohana.

Juushiro had walked around the 4th Division looking for his fellow taichou, following her reiatsu. He was concentrated on just delivering the message; he didn't notice where he was going.

He had finally located the taichou, and opened the door.

And here we are, at this place and time.

Juushiro had accidentally walked in on Unohana changing.

She was only in her underwear.

Juushiro had many thoughts as he started to go red in the face as he stared at Unohana.

_Damn, she's hot!_

Juushiro shook his head and looked down. No! He wasn't allowed to have such thoughts about her! Unohana moved closer to him, and Juushiro started to shake, clenching his fists.

"You look a bit ill, Ukitake-taichou. Maybe you should lie down." Unohana said softly, placing her hand against his forehead. Ukitake felt her body heat, and started to back up a bit. He had to get out of here, tell Isane, and have her tell Unohana. This was too much for him.

But Unohana had him pinned against a wall.

It was a good thing the 13th taichou wasn't claustrophobic. That would make this situation twice as bad.

"I'm f-f-f-fine…" Juushiro stammered. He closed his eyes and flinched. Impure thoughts were piling up in his head, and the inner pervert of the captain started to show in his mind. Juushiro forced the perverted ness away as he felt Unohana's body heat move away. He resisted the urge to sigh in relief. He heard a drawer open and close as Unohana talked.

"So, what brings you here?" She said calmly. Juushiro wracked his brain until he finally remembered what had brought him here in the first place.

"Um, there's um a captain's meeting, um, this morning." Juushiro said. He opened his eyes and saw that Unohana was fully dressed. He felt his temperature go down a little bit, and his inner pervert became locked away… for the time being.

"Maybe you shouldn't go to the meeting." Unohana said gently. Juushiro shook his head as they walked through the 4th Division.

"No, I'm fine." Juushiro said. Quite truthfully, he had felt better when he saw Unohana dressed. The lightheadedness he had felt had went away.

"Well, I'll take a look at you after the meeting." Unohana said, smiling. Juushiro's temperature increased dramatically and he felt dizzy. _What is this?_ He thought before almost falling over. Unohana caught him and steadied the captain.

"You should really lie down, Ukitake-taichou." Unohana said. Juushiro didn't try to resist. He allowed her to half-lead, half-carry the taichou to a futon, where he laid down. Unohana placed her hand on his forehead and he suddenly felt lethargic.

"_Nemuri_, Ukitake-taichou. (2)"

That was the last thing he heard before he fell into a deep sleep.

**

* * *

**

Sakana Satoshi and her father, Shunsui Kyoraku was waiting in front of the first division building.

"Where is he?" Sakana said, looking rather pissed. Shunsui sighed and tried to calm his daughter down. Sakana had contracted a weaker version of Juushiro's disease when she learned under him, and if she got too stressed she would have an attack similar to her sensei's.

Of course, Sakana didn't know this. Unohana had just told her that it was too much work that was causing her to pass out, which was partially true. The short captain took after her father in many ways, but she would do her paperwork (as much as she hated it). When there were days when there was double, even triple the paperwork (considering most of the third and ninth division's paperwork was forwarded to her), Sakana would leave it to her two twin lieutenants, Enkou and Hana Sentaishi. They never knew why Sakana slacked off; they assumed it was something in her genes that was passed down from her father.

"Calm down, Sakana. You don't want to pass out again, do you?"

Sakana sighed. "I suppose your right. Whoa!" she said in surprise as Unohana shunpo'ed a few inches away from her.

"_Gomen_, Sakana-chan. (3)" Unohana said. Sakana's innate sixth sense caused the 14th Division taichou to feel weird. She couldn't place what it was… Unohana was emitting a weird feeling that caused the taichou of the Animal Tactics Division to feel uncomfortable.

"_Doushita_, Sakana?" Shunsui asked. Sakana shrugged.

"I just have this weird feeling…" she said, her face getting slightly pink. Shunsui closed his eyes and concentrated on the sixth sense that had been passed through the Kyoraku clan for generations (Gawd, I'm sounding like Armstrong from FMA…)

Unlike Sakana, who only had to pass someone to get their feelings, Shunsui actually had to use reiatsu to do it. He felt his face get hot as well as he read Unohana's feelings.

"I don't know what it is." He said, opening his eyes. Sakana shrugged and they followed Unohana into the building.

* * *

Unohana didn't pay a scrap of attention on the meeting. She just couldn't get Juushiro off of her mind for some reason. She shrugged the feeling off, which made Sakana and Shunsui relax slightly. The tension coming from Unohana was bothering both taichou.

After the two-hour meeting, Juushiro quickly flash-stepped to his own division to avoid running into Unohana when she returned from the meeting. He thought his system wouldn't take another attack like he had had earlier.

"Where's Ukitake-taichou?" Unohana said, confused. Isane shrugged as they stared at the bed where Juushiro had lay a few moments ago.

* * *

A Few Days later…

Juushiro lay in his own bed in his quarters. He had been avoiding Unohana to prevent another attack from happening. No matter how silly it was, he would continue it until he felt confident enough that it wouldn't happen again. His subordinates worried all over him when he got back. Rukia had brought him some chocolate. Shunsui brought some sake and tried to get him to drink with him.

But it wasn't enough.

Only one thing, one woman, could help quell the feeling that something was missing.

_Unohana._

Juushiro sighed, and buried himself in the many blankets on his bed.

**

* * *

**

Unohana sighed as she laid on her futon, thinking. She hadn't gotten anything done since she told Juushiro to go home and rest. She had been too busy thinking and having fantasies she shouldn't be having about the man.

Unohana had fallen in love with Juushiro the first time she saw him. When she made captain, all dreams of ever being with him were shattered into tiny pieces. She soon started to hide her feelings for the taichou, knowing that since they were colleagues, they could never be a couple.

She wasn't even sure if he liked her back. They way Juushiro tried to back away from her, and the way he had been avoiding her the past few days proved her theorem. (Whoa, geometry talk. Hehe, proof.) But still, she couldn't help longing for him. She wanted to be in his arms, to feel his lips on hers. She shook her head, trying to disperse the thoughts in her head. He felt nothing for her, which made it harder for the fourth division captain to fall asleep.

Unohana shoved off the covers, put on a robe, and sat outside in a chair, staring at the moon. The moon reminded her of Juushiro's hair. She had gotten many chances to touch his hair, but never thought about it until now. After a few minutes she sighed and returned to her room, falling asleep and having dreams about Juushiro.

* * *

Juushiro woke up the next morning feeling a little awkward. He had had dreams about Unohana that normally would have never crossed his mind in another thousand years. X-rated dreams. He took a cold shower and got dressed, trying to get rid of those dreams and force them back into the corners of his mind.

When he walked into his office, he felt slightly lightheaded, but shrugged it off. He didn't have any paperwork (Gaspeth! The end of the world is coming!), so he spent a few hours simply sitting at his desk and thinking about Unohana. Nobody in his division bothered him, although Sentarou and Kiyone were extremely worried about their captain.

"Maybe we should call Unohana-taichou! Something's obviously wrong!" Kiyone said. Sentarou nodded.

"I'll go get Unohana!" Sentarou said.

"No, I will! I'll be much faster!" Kiyone argued as Juushiro tensed slightly.

"Fine, we'll both go get Unohana-taichou." Sentarou said, and with that they both shunpo'ed away to the fourth division.

When they came back with the 4th taichou, however, Juushiro was nowhere in sight.

"I thought you said Ukitake-taichou was here?" Unohana said as Kiyone and Sentarou looked around cluelessly.

"But-But he was right here!" Kiyone stammered.

Juushiro hid on the roof of the building. His heart was pounding and he felt very hot. He couldn't help feeling foolish for lying on his stomach hiding from the woman he loved. But he was going to stay here.

Shunsui had horrible timing sometimes.

The man in the fuchsia haori appeared right next to his friend. "Juu-chan! What are you doing on the roof?" he asked, causing Juushiro to fall off of the roof and onto the ground.

"Ow…" Juushiro grumbled, getting up and dusting himself off. He looked up and blushed a red.

"H-hello, Unohana-taichou." He squeaked. Shunsui hopped off of the roof and landed next to his friend.

"I told you I'd find him! Now, you can go to the fourth and stay there into you are of perfect health!" Shunsui said. Kiyone and Sentarou disappeared to another division to pick up some paperwork. Juushiro started to try to think of an excuse to avoid the fourth division taichou.

"I-I'm fine!" he said. Shunsui shrugged and shunpo'ed away, leaving Juushiro alone with Unohana. She gently placed her wrist on his forehead, and he could smell mangos; his favorite fruit.

"Maybe I should examine you." Unohana said softly as Juushiro mentally drowned in her scent, "You don't look so well."

"I-I juncyou, Unohana-taichou. (4)" Juushiro meeped.

"Ukitake-taichou," Unohana said, sounding surprised. Suddenly Shunsui shunpo'ed next to them, causing both of them to jump.

"You've gotta help me! My sweet Nanao-chan is out to kill me!" Shunsui said softly. They could hear Nanao calling out her captain's name.

"What did you do now?" Unohana asked. Shunsui shrugged.

"I think it might have been I skipped doing paperwork to find Juushiro!" he said as a dictionary came flying out of nowhere and clocked the namakemono taichou (5) in the head. He fell onto the ground.

"Nanao-chan, I-I can explain!"

"EXPLAIN THIS!!" Nanao shouted, obviously pissed off. She placed at least five different Kido spells on the poor taichou. Unohana and Juushiro resisted the urge to laugh as Nanao hefted her taichou (who was unable to even move an inch) onto her shoulder and shunpo'ed away.

"Poor Shunsui," Unohana said, smiling.

"I know. Nanao-fukutaichou is probably going to make him do about a week's worth of paperwork in two hours." Juushiro said, suppressing a laugh but failing.

"Well, I'd better get going." Unohana said. She turned around and got ready to shunpo back to her own division.

As Juushiro watched her leave, a rage that had been kept in the back of his mind snapped.

Why couldn't he admit to her that he loved her? So what if they worked together? It didn't matter! Then he corrected himself. It would matter. It wasn't possible. Because of their positions, it couldn't work. He shoved that thought into the mental trash can.

Kiyone, Sentarou, and Rukia were cleaning the office, so Juushiro was banned from working in there until the place was spotless. So he wandered around without purpose, thinking. A lightbulb went off in his head, and he grinned.

He would buy Unohana flowers! All girls loved flowers, right?

Meanwhile, in the 14th Division, Sakana sneezed for the 38th time as moved the vase of day lilies her father got her for Easter into her lieutenants' office.

"Gawd, I hate flowers. Why did I have to be allergic to this kind?" she grumbled as she wiped her nose. The captain was only allergic to day lilies, and they grew often around her office.

Juushiro quickly told Yamamoto that he was going to the human world. Yamamoto raised an eyebrow, but granted permission. Then Juushiro swiftly ran to his division. While he was running he ran past the 8th Division he could hear howls of anguish coming from Shunsui. He laughed, knowing that Ise-fukutaichou was giving Shunsui a hard time. He reached his office and opened drawers, shuffling around until he found some of the currency from the human world; yen, if he remembered properly. He stopped in front of a confused Rukia Kuchiki.

"Kuchiki, take care of the division while I'm gone." Juushiro said, then he shunpo'ed away, leaving Rukia quite befuddled.

Juushiro was soon walking around in a gigai. Many people stared at the man with silver hair, wearing a gold-colored haori over a t-shirt and jeans. He went inside a flower shop (which was ironically called "Ukitake's Flower Shop (6)"). It had been a long time since he had bought flowers for a woman. After a while he picked out some flowers and paid for them.

**

* * *

**

In the meantime, Unohana was running out of ideas. So she went to the one person who she could talk to.

"Hey, Uno-a-a-achoo!-Hana!" Sakana said, wiping her nose.

"Sakana, I have a secret to tell you." Unohana said, sitting in front of the younger captain.

"Have at it." Sakana said while taking a sip of tea.

"I'm in love with Juushiro!" Unohana declared.

Sakana spewed the tea she was drinking everywhere and started choking. "HACK CHOKE COUGH GASP WHEEZE GAG CHOKE COUGH!"

Unohana looked at Sakana with concern. "Are you okay?"

Sakana grinned. "Nani?! That's fantastic! So, what do you need?"

"I need to know how to profess my love for him." Unohana said. Sakana took a paper towel and cleaned up the mess of tea on the floor.

"My advice is to let the man make the first move, Retsu." Sakana said, throwing the paper towels away and sitting back in front of her colleague.

"What? Are you serious? I don't even know if he has feelings for me!" Unohana stammered.

"Trust me; he likes you. That's why he's been avoiding you for a while. It's always better to let the man make the first move. That's how it worked with Toshiro and me. If the man makes the first move, he's obviously dedicated to you. If the woman has to make the first move, he may not be interested. I learned that a long time ago." Sakana said, "If a man really loves you he'll make the first move."

"Well, well, someone seems to know a lot about women." Unohana teased, making Sakana go red. Unohana knew the captain when she first joined the Gotei 13; she had been a shy girl, but quickly made third seat in her squad.

"Shut up, Retsu! I've learned from experience. Now, if a man gets you flowers, he wants you to love him. If he gets you chocolate, he knows you like him, but he wants to make sure. If he gets you nothing but kisses you passionately, you're one lucky woman." Sakana said.

"But what if he gets all three?" Unohana questioned.

"Well, you're extremely freaking lucky." Sakana said, smiling, "I remember Toshiro got me a really nice bouquet of flowers. It took him a lot of courage to do that, seeing as he always wants to be treated like an adult. And if a man gets you something you really like, you're obviously made for each other, especially if you've never told him what you like. Shiro-kun got me forget-me-nots; he knew I loved them even though I never told him about it. We've been secretly dating, cause Y'know captain's can't really be together, but that hasn't stopped us!" Sakana said cheerfully. Then she paused, going silent.

"…You have to meet our captain. She's nice, smart, and so sweet. She should be here doing paperwork-"

The door opened, and Hana Sentaishi, one of Sakana's vice-captains, stared at her captain. A new recruit was standing next to her.

"Taichou… what are you doing?" Hana said in a dangerous tone.

"Eheheh… just was helping a comrade…." Sakana said.

"That is our captain." Hana said to the recruit with an evil glint in her eyes. Sakana put up her hands.

"Hey, hey! I finished the paperwork already!"

Hana went over to the taichou's desk and relaxed.

"Oh, alright. C'mon, I'll show you where you'll be staying…" Hana said, walking off with the recruit in tow.

"Anywho, the system works both ways. Let's just say Juushiro got you flowers. It's essential that you reply within the next day, or he'll feel rejected. You can either let him know in person or by giving him a peach blossom or a red rose. Or both. That's just traditional. Come to think of it…" Sakana mused, "I think I saw him going to the human world… who knows, maybe he's getting you something…"

"You think so?" Unohana said excitedly. Sakana shrugged.

"Just wait and see, Retsu-chan."

**

* * *

**

After about an hour of careful deliberation, Juushiro finally made a choice. He had the flowers wrapped in green paper with a gold ribbon.

"Hope you wow that lady, mister." The old man at the counter said. Juushiro nodded and hurried back to the Seireitei.

_I hope so too…_

He then went to Shunsui. The taichou was looking very exhausted. His right hand had bandages on it, possibly from doing too much paperwork in such a little period of time.

"Are you alright, Shun?" Juushiro asked. Shunsui nodded.

"Very well. Do you have a card that's NOT gaudy that I can give Unohana?" he asked. Shunsui had a smirk on his face.

"So, you're in love with the beautiful Retsu-chan?"

"Hai. So do you?" Juushiro demanded. Shunsui grabbed Juushiro's sleeve and dragged him to his desk. He pulled out a bunch of greeting cards.

"Are you sure you don't want-" Shunsui started.

"No, I've already found what I wanted. Thanks, Shun!" Juushiro called out, shunpo'ing away.

* * *

"Are these for me?" Unohana said, confused. Isane was holding a bouquet of red roses with the occasional white rose. The opened the card that Isane had handed her. She read the verse that had been automatically printed on the card.

"_Believe in what your heart is saying_

_Hear the melody that's playing_

_There's no time to waste_

_There's so much to celebrate_

_Believe in what you feel inside_

_And give your dreams the wings to fly_

_You have everything you need _

_If you just believe. (7)"_

Unohana smiled, and read what Juushiro had written on the card.

_Unohana,_

_I don't know how you feel about me, but I love you. Please accept these roses as proof of my undying love for you._

_Juushiro_

Unohana blushed, the words Sakana said coming back to her. That girl was wise beyond her years, truly, even if she was over two hundred years old. She ran to the Female Shinigami Association's garden and searched around.

"Uno-chan, Whatcha doing?" a young girl's voice said. Unohana jumped, and saw Yachiru sitting on a rock.

"Um, I'm, um…" Unohana stammered, holding the flower she had been looking for behind her back.

"Look! A distraction! (8)" Unohana shouted, pointing dramatically behind Yachiru. She looked back.

"Hey! There's nothing there!" Yachiru said, turning back around, but Unohana was already gone. "That's not fair! You tricked me!" Yachiru cried, pouting.

* * *

Juushiro was trying to do paperwork, but to no avail. He couldn't stop thinking about the flowers he had sent Unohana. He finally couldn't take it anymore and got up out of his chair.

He stepped outside just as Unohana shunpo'ed in front of him.

"Unohana!" Juushiro said, surprised. His heart started to hammer in his chest.

"Um, I just wanted to give you this…" Unohana said, presenting the rose she had gotten to him. He took it and placed it in his hair.

_What's going to happen?_ Unohana thought. Her thoughts were cut off as he kissed her.

Juushiro couldn't think of what to do next. She loved him. He loved her.

All was right with the world.

Unohana, no _Retsu_, broke the kiss. "_Aishiteru_, Juushiro-kun." She whispered. Juushiro couldn't be more happier. He hugged her, inhaling her scent of mangos.

"_Aishiteru, Taichou no Kanojo_," Juushiro whispered in response.

A Jigokucho flew and landed on Juushiro's nose, causing him to sneeze. It landed on Retsu's hand.

_Attention All Captains: there will be a meeting held in the 1__st__ Division. Come immediately._

"I guess we'd better get going, Retsu-chan." Juushiro said, taking her hand in his. The two shunpo'ed away to the first division building.

* * *

Shunsui was not the best person for keeping secrets.

Considering he went to the taichou meeting totally wasted.

"Oi, Juu-chan! Rumor says you won Retsu-chan over!"

Everyone at the meeting went quiet, and Retsu looked nervously at the floor. Juushiro started playing with the flower in his hair that he had forgotten to take out. Sakana looked sympathetically at her best friend, and then glared at her father. Juushiro wanted to pull out his Zanpakuto and strike Shunsui down.

"Unohana, Juushiro, I want to speak to you in private. Shunsui, please wait outside; I want to have a word with you later. Everyone else is free to go." Genryusai-taichou said.

Everyone left, leaving the couple standing in front of Genryusai-taichou.

"Juushiro. Unohana. I can't believe this. Is this true?" Genryusai-taichou said in a stern tone. Juushiro and Unohana both looked at the ground in partial shame, partial fear.

"You know the rules. This relationship is not allowed." Genryusai-taichou said. Retsu gently gripped Juushiro's hand. Jushiro was about to retort when Genryusai-taichou smiled.

"However, I will allow it."

"_Nani?!?!?!"_ Both taichou said in unison.

"It took you long enough. It was bound to happen." The old man said, laughing at the couple's astonished faces. "I ask that you make it discreet, however."

"Arigatou, Genryusai-sensei." Juushiro said.

"Now go, and send Shunsui in here as you go." Genryusai-taichou said gently. The couple left.

"Yamamoto-sensei wants to see you." Juushiro said. Shunsui gulped and walked in.

Retsu wrapped her hand around Juushiro's. The happy couple walked down the street when they heard footsteps.

"…What's that?" Retsu asked. The couple stopped and slowly turned around to see a stampede of 4th & 13th Division subordinates, as well as the Female Shinigami Association.

"TAICHOU! WHY DID YOU KEEP IT A SECRET!" Kiyone and Sentarou shouted.

"So! Are you going out?" Yachiru asked, obviously looking for juicy gossip to share with the entire Seireitei. Retsu and Juushiro gulped and shunpo'ed away to the thirteenth division.

* * *

"So, what do you want to do?" Retsu said, standing in front of Juushiro's quarters. Juushiro kissed her lightly.

"Well…" Juushiro then whispered something in Retsu's ear, making her giggle.

"Yosh, kawayui.(9)" Retsu said. Juushiro picked his love up bridal style into his quarters, shutting the door with his foot behind them.

(1) What's the matter/what's wrong, Captain Ukitake?

(2) Sleep, Captain Ukitake

(3) Sorry, Sakana-chan.

(4) I'm fine, Unohana.

(5) The lazy captain

(6) I actually made an ad for Web Page (we use Fireworks and Flash) for a flower shop for a Valentine's Day assignment. The flower shop is called Ukitake's Flower shop.

(7) This line comes from the song "Believe" from the Polar Express. I was listening to it while writing this.

(8) Ichigo has fallen for this. Try it on your friends. It's funny. Even _I_ have fallen for it.

(9) Alright, darling.

Did you like? I spent a whole day writing it. This is the longest one-shot I have ever written. It's nine pages… Oo Anywho I hope you enjoyed it. Read and Review!!! I might do a little sequel of this.

-Ranger MattsyKun the Ninja Alchemist


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